There and Shrekked Again
by Mongoose Lover
Summary: Shrek was at the Fairy Goodmother's old shop when Donkey clumsily sent them through a portal to Middle Earth. Forced to enlist in the company of Dwarves, they soon find that Bilbo's Ring is the One Ring and need to find a way to destroy it. But getting the gold from Smaug and getting into Mordor are no easy tasks. They have to brave Azog, Smaug, Sauron, and Saruman to do it.


**CHAPTER ONE: THE DOOR TO ANOTHER WORLD**

* * *

Shrek, Donkey, Fiona, and Puss in Boots were exploring the late Fairy Godmother's shop. It had all sorts of things in it and Shrek wanted to get a birthday gift for Fiona, though he hadn't let on that that was why he was there, as he had said he had already gotten one. They had left the triplets with the Three Little Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf to watch. They hoped that when they got back home, that they wouldn't find the place even messier than Shrek preferred.

Donkey was looking around. He spotted a potion. "Hey, look, hair potion. Now you can get some plugs Shrek!" said Donkey excitedly.

"I do NOT need hair!" grumbled Shrek in annoyance.

"Come on, try it out Shrek!" said Donkey. He poured it on Shrek's head.

"Donkey…I don't want….!" grumbled Shrek in annoyance. He suddenly grew a bunch of hair, which looked like Elvis's hair.

"Check it out Shrek." said Donkey excitedly, holding up a mirror.

Shrek looked into the mirror. He cried out in horror. "Ahhhhhhh!" He dropped the mirror and it fell to the floor and shattered.

"What's going on Shrek?" came Fiona's voice through a door. Shrek didn't want his wife to see him with this weird hairdo.

"Er, nothing dear. Donkey and I are just fooling around." Shrek lied nervously to his wife. "Now, I want you to fix this." whispered Shrek in a calm yet threatening tone to Donkey.

Donkey went and got another hair potion. "Maybe this is removal." he said to himself aloud. He poured it on Shrek. It didn't get rid of the hair. Instead, it grew hair all over his body, making him look like Bigfoot.

Shrek went and looked into a mirror. It shattered on its own this time! "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" yelled Shrek even more loudly.

"Shrek, what is bothering you?" came Fiona's voice, even louder.

"Nothing, Donkey and I are just wrestling." Shrek lied to her again.

Donkey tried another potion. This one get rid of the hair, but instead gave Shrek a lot of chest hair.

Shrek looked in a third mirror, making sure to avoid stepping on the pieces of the other two broken mirrors as he walked. "Hey, not bad." he said happily, grinning.

However, Donkey hadn't noticed that Shrek liked this one and had come back with another one. "This one should do it." said Donkey happily.

"Donkey….wait….wait…wait!" Shrek cried. However, too late, Donkey poured it onto Shrek, restoring him to normal. "Aw man." groaned Shrek.

Fiona came into the room, for she had wondered what was up with Shrek. Puss in Boots followed her. She groaned when she saw the broken glass. "Next time, make sure you don't wrestle near the furniture." she scolded Shrek and Donkey.

"I'm glad you guys are all right. I was worried you were having a cat-a-strophe." said Puss in Boots. Shrek groaned at Puss's pun.

Donkey, meanwhile, found a spell book. He noticed one that said "A Spell to Open Up a Whole New World". "Hey guys, I found a spell to open up a whole new world." he proclaimed excitedly, grinning.

"No Donkey!" said Shrek firmly.

"Please." begged Donkey, trying to give Shrek the Puss in Boots cute cat eyes.

"Nice try. Only Puss can pull it off." laughed Shrek.

"But I wanna open up a whole new world!" Donkey whined, frowning at Shrek.

"Let's not and say we did." said Shrek in annoyance.

"Worldus Openus." said Donkey, reciting the spell. Suddenly, a giant portal appeared. It started to pull them in.

"Donkey, what did you do?!" cried Shrek in horror.

"Oops." said Donkey in embarrassment, trying to play innocent.

Just right before they got pulled through the spinning white portal, Puss in Boots complained "And I was just about to go off and have my cat nap too!"

WHOOSH! They went through space. There was a huge blur around them. They were spinning. When it all stopped and they were on solid ground again, they found that they were on the eastern side of the Misty Mountains.

"DONKEY!" yelled Shrek in horror.

Shrek aimed a kick at Donkey, as he was angry. This caused them to go tumbling down a small embankment, and, unfortunately, having collided with Fiona and Puss, taking them too. They reached the bottom. There were 15 travelers walking by.

Donkey tried to run from an enraged Shrek. Donkey ran right into a burly figure. The figure was staring at the four intruders, opened mouthed.

"Sorry." said Donkey, hoping the beefy stranger wouldn't hurt him.

"A talking donkey! What in the name of Durin?!" gasped Thorin Oakenshield in complete shock.

The 13 Dwarves, the Hobbit, and the Wizard stared in amazement at the four strangers, especially Donkey.


End file.
